For a lot of people, once you’ve tried a cruise there’s no going back. Bookers become repeat bookers, as they become complete cruise converts who simply cannot even consider taking any other form of holiday.
But what if you became a little bit too obsessed? A little bit too much in love with sailing away? What if you became a hardcore cruise fan?
Here are 10 signs to keep an eye out for to make sure you’re not becoming too enthralled with it all – if such a thing exists:
#1 All of your towels at home are folded into various towel animals – even those that are kept in the cupboard for when the guests arrive. Because what other way would you want to store towels?
#2 You’ve reprogrammed your sat nav in the car so that instead of instructing you to turn left, you’ll be told “in three miles, turn sharp to port”. Simply because it’s fun, and because it means your partner won’t be able to borrow it because they get confused.
#3 You have your chimney at home painted in cruise line colours.
#4 Your garden doesn’t have decking, it has a “Sun Deck”.
#5 And speaking of that Sun Deck, you’ve got a TV outside so you can recreate that feeling of watching Movies under the Stars. But it’s got an umbrella over it, for protection.
#6 You’ve convinced your other half that a move to Southampton makes sense, because it’s got great access to London but without all of the rush. Whereas in reality you just want to be close to the port to spy on ships.
#7 You don’t go on family days out, you go on “excursions”. And you have to make sure you’re back home in time for dinner.
#8 You decided to get the windows replaced with portholes. And your bed you share with a partner is a zip-and-link, so you can split it into twin beds. For nights when you’ve argued.
#9 You have an emergency pizza kept in the freezer at home, for those moments when you’re craving a trip to a midnight pizza counter. It’s always good to be prepared.
#10 When you’re making detailed plans for your next cruise, whilst still ‘enjoying’ your current one.
These are just 10 that I’ve come up with, but let me know if there are any others you can think of that are any better – I’ll be happy to update my list with your suggestions!
By Ian Lewis